Kill You, Sure (6)
Nidhu
Bhusan Das
“He’s amenable,”Divya
thinks. She's never before found Anik so morose and melancholic in thought. “It
appears he’s beside himself. His unconcerned state points to the possibility
that he’s distraught,”Divya tends to think. She’s in the library soon after
dinner at 8 p.m.Anik’s never late. Tonight he’s seen nowhere here. “Is it he’s
looking for something he hasn’t been interested so long? Is he after someone?
Is it some idea or a dream…someone he’s found after a long quest, has found and
seen but cannot reach, unable to relate and link?” she’s puzzled, really.” It’s
time for her to stand by him. Who knows, it may be the right time to strike a
chord with him!” she thinks, though she hates such opportunistic idea. Anxious
and impatient, she decides to go downstairs to feel better with a cup of black coffee.
As the lift door opens she sees Anik’s materialized.”Hi, nice to meet you,” he
greets Divya, uncharacteristically. Divya’s taken aback at the unexpected
greeting, but steadies herself and says,” I’m here since 8.You’re late, I’m
afraid. Let’s go and have a cup of coffee.” Anik smiles and follows her back
into the lift.Divya orders coffee and glides into thought.
“The
world – external and internal - changes. His greeting is significant. He’s been
always a boy in love of study. No, he isn’t a bibliophile. But he can think
long and deep. Handsome and thoughtful, such a boy’s coveted by many a girl. He
hasn’t been aware of their tenderness, not even mine who’ve been aspiring for his
love since the college days. I know he belongs to a conservative family. But
Haryana society’s been demonstrating practical wisdom in respect of exogamy and
interracial marriage. I don’t think he’s concerned about social inhibitions;
what’s his concern’s his academic involvement.This is for the first time he’s
said ‘Hi!’ to me. We’ve met many a time but he’s never said’ nice to meet you’.
Is he changed, really! I’ve come to develop tenderness towards him the moment I
saw him in the queue next to ours for admission in the college. I smiled, he
didn’t. I tried to draw his attention many a time, he proved to be withdrawn.
Now he appears to have turned interested, more or less…”
“Hello
Divya, what’re you thinking?”
She
stirs into the reality of his smiling face and tender eyes.”No, nothing.Just
feeling good.”
“Feeling
good! Why, anything interesting?”
“You’ve
greeted me for the first time. Isn’t it interesting enough to let me plunge
into wonderful thought?”
“But
I always think you’re a nice girl.True, I ain’t articulate.”
“You’re
really a unique boy; I cannot but appreciate your distinctiveness. How’s the
coffee?”
“It’s
like you, exceptional!”He bites his lips for the slip of the tongue.
“Understand,”
she says, smiling as she squints.
“Let’s
go study now.”
“Possibly
we may have another round of the coffee.”
“I
understand you’re very particular about study…that’s why I…”
“You’re
right. But this is also study – understanding your mind.”
“My
mind! Is it worth understanding it?”
“Haryana
society goes more and more liberal these days, doesn’t it?”
“That’s
right. So what!” She’s beyond her usual sense of humility.
“Interracial
love’s possible now, even inter-religious.”
“I
see you’re researching the phenomenon. Well, it’s good to explore social psychology
and dynamics,” she remarks.
“What’s
social’s relative to the individual ones; the two’re complementary, if I ain’t
wrong.”
“Whatever
be it, I ain’t related to or influenced by it, anyway.”
“That’s
why I like you, your independent spirit, and way of thinking.”
Divya hides her smile, measures
the depth of his sincerity. He’s, no doubt, a good friend, thoughtful and
respects the independence of others.
“Well
Anik, could you tell me when you came to like me?”
“I
can’t exactly remember, maybe on the first day.”
“First
day means?”
“When
you’d a sly look at me from the admission queue at college.”
“But
you didn’t let anybody guess it even.”
“What
can I do if that anybody isn’t able to read the mind?”
“I
didn’t know you’re so naughty. Show off innocence and contemplate on a girl
like me,” says Divya, visibly happy and proud.
“Can’t
we talk away the night?”
“So
that you could read my mind.”
“I’ve
already read your mind, girl.”
“Is
it? Very dangerous! But I cannot read you.”
“If
so, you haven’t tried, possibly.”
“How
can I think of? You haven’t shown interest in anything other than study.”
“You’ve
been my book and subject of my study.”
“And
like a coward you’ve kept it a closely guarded secret,” she banters.
“Now
it’s clear to you, I should think.”
“But
you’re a prowler, I dare say.”
“Not
a tiger, afterall.A boy, following a girl.Is it unnatural?”
“Yes,
it is. You haven’t the courage to share your feeling with the girl you like.”
“I
must understand first how she’d react.”
“My
sly look didn’t convey any message?”
“You’d
the sly look but not the observation. You could look on but not notice.”
“I
noticed but couldn’t believe. You could hide your feeling; prevent your emotion
from being betrayed.”
They haven’t returned to the
reading room, spent the night chatting and dreaming, indulging in mental mapping.
Does Anik’s focus have shifted from the green to the black eyes really, and so
soon? The summer vacation’s to end in a fortnight. The green eyes will come
back. Why’s he in such a haste?(to be continued on 6 August 2015)
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