She Won't Reveal 33

                          She Won’t Reveal (33)

                     Nidhu Bhusan Das

Everyone in the room heard the telephone conversation with ears cocked. They’re eager to know what had transpired. The worry, writ large in the face of Sujata, didn’t escape the eyes. They’re curious.Sujata waspishly said,”Maqbool’s in Amlarem.That girl, his gf, telephoned.” Anu’s face turned pale, and she couldn’t utter a word.” We’ll see to it, nothing to worry,” Sujata put on a brave face and took the hand of Anu saying,” let’s have dinner.” They went to the dining room downstairs. Everyone’s relieved as they relied on the assurance of Sujata believing she’d the capacity to tackle the situation.

The dining table’s lined with dishes.Prof. Sanyal led the show reciting a self-composed poem to the delight of all:

This is the Day we are here to celebrate

This is the Day we are together

To see you brighter, and to pray

You may blow out at least

Candles a hundred

May your joy be more and more

As you with years grow

And the dreams come true.

                 The food’s excellent. An elaborate menu: saffron flavoured buttered rice, pineaaple hilsa, mung dal, naan, chicken reshmi kebab, potato salad, pickled onions and mango ice-cream. Everyone enjoyed the sumptuous meal. The feast over, they went upstairs and huddled into the room where Sujata’s lodged. Professor Sanyal asked Prafullada and Angshu to go downstairs to their rooms. Now the three were involved in finding out a way out of the impending trouble. The next day was Nilu’s wedding.Maqbool must have come to create problem.Disturbed, Anu said she’d like to leave for Guwahati with them. Professor Sanyal thought a couple of minutes and said,” It wouldn’t be wise. Better we face the situation. I’ll meet Maqbool if he comes. We cannot allow blackmail.” Anu felt assured but said,” I must leave the place. It doesn’t suit me. I feel quite lonely, always.”  The professor said,” Let the tomorrow come. We’ll decide. It’s time to go to bed and have a sound sleep, Beti.Go and sleep well.” He went downstairs and straight to the room where Angshu’s awaiting him.                   Changing into the night gown he straightened on the bed and pulled the quilt over. The words of Anu “I feel quite lonely” rang in his ear and he lapsed into a deep thought:”Anu must have been on the threshold of positive feeling. If loneliness is an unwilling solitude, she’s willing to come out of it. She might feel enough is enough.”

“Is it monophobia i.e., the feeling of being alone?” he thought.

“No, rather, it’s possible, she feels being isolated from well wishers. This could be the phase of possibilities for her psychological rehabilitation, reunion back home with parents. Maybe, it’s the phase of her possible resurrection,” he analyzed.

“Could it be called resurrection? I ain’t sure. If it’s resurrection, where’s the way out for her? Reunion’s the better term, mabe.But is it the appropriate term, at all? Or, is it the resurrection of her childhood innocence? Yes, resurrection’s the appropriate term in this sense,” concluded the professor rounding up the debate and dilemma.

“After three years of mental struggle, experiments with different kinds of friendship and dabbling with sadhana she might feel empty and hollow within. She wants to restore the standard relationship. She’s in fear. She calls me papa. It means she needs a papa. It’s definitely her first step towards going back to her papa, and her mom,” he noted.

                    Anu’s in the warmth and security of Sujata under the quilt. Tonight they’re more intimate than ever before. Crisis brings people closer than sunny days and engenders profound feeling, brings about poignant moments and cathartic understanding. Such an understanding’s often marked by a serene silence. While Sujata’s occupied with the possible developments of the day ahead, Anu’s in interaction with Thammi who joined her after the Guruji’d gone into sleep in his ashram. Thammi advised her to rely on the professor and let him face Maqbool who’d come to the bungalow by 10 the next morning. She advised Anu against interacting with the Kashmiri boy. She also told Anu not to communicate with Anuradha. Anu felt, to be cut-off from Auradha’s so painful. “Yet I won’t go against the advice of Thammi and my god-given papa,”Anu resolved. She’d like to have a new life relying on the wisdom of the two and heavenly love of Sujata.She understood the other friends took her to be a sitting duck, and wanted to exploit her in their own interests and ways. Her goodness was thought to be her weakness, or Maqbool couldn’t have created the undesirable situation. She wept, and realized when interested people thought she’s without real friends they tried to take advantage of the assumed situation. Even Anuradha, whom she took to be real friend, was no exception. The behaviour of the girl seemed to be mysterious. She promised on her own she wouldn’t keep contact with Maqbool but was in communication with him and remained updated about his movement and activities. She didn’t want to be in such a world of conspiracy where people’re out to malign and blackmail her.” Papa mayn’t have given me time and company, but he wanted me to be an accomplished person. When I didn’t take admission for medical study, he and maa might have been unhappy and frustrated but they never questioned my decision. They didn’t go against my affair with Arup, and the break-up with him was my failure. They didn’t question it. I left them. It must have hurt them. I didn’t do justice to them. I failed to perform my duty to my parents, and I’m their only child.”Anu spent the rest of the night in introspection Thammi had induced in her.( continued on 1^st January 2015)